My Apartment Toolbox

Just because we have a skilled and dedicated maintenance crew doesn’t mean you should be without at least a small handful of select tools. Whether you need to make repairs, assemble your new BJÖRKSNÄS, or just smash some junk with a big hammer in a fit of untethered rage, a set of tools is a handy thing to have around. Do not get me wrong, I'm not suggesting you perform repairs on your unit if you aren't sure what you are doing but there are many other reasons to have a set of tools and some tools are going to be more useful than others.

HAMMER

A hammer is a must for doing things like hanging art or braining intruders but make sure it's not the only tool you buy. If all you have is a hammer than every problem looks like a nail and that makes YOU a tool. Remember to buy a decent hammer as you don't want to cheap out on something like that and DO NOT BUY LITTLE CRAFT HAMMERS WITH CUTE LITTLE DESIGNS ON THEM, they are useless.

SCREW DRIVERS

A set of assorted size screwdrivers in Phillips (+) and Standard (-) head designs is an absolute must. This whole world is held together with screws (and duct tape). Screwdrivers have different size heads as well to accommodate the plethora of different screw types and if you use the wrong size you risk screwing yourself and stripping the head.

 

 

 

TAPE MEASURE

This will help in countless ways. Measuring for furniture, making cuts to trim, seeing how far out you can extend the tape before it collapses, etc. If you aren’t good at reading a tape measure they make some with all the small hash marks labeled. Get one that is at least 20' for maximum usefulness.

 

 

 

 

UTILITY KNIFE AND BLADES

Dull knives and improperly used cutting tools are a huge contributor to mangled fingers and ruined carpets. If you are doing any cutting you should really have a good utility knife with disposable blades. Do not use blades when they are dull, it requires too much pressure and that is how people get hurt.

HEX KEYES (ALLEN WRENCH)

Useful for everything from Swedish furniture assembly to bicycle repair, you absolutely must have a set of these. Heck, you probably do already. These are very cheap to manufacture so don't spend too much on these or you are being a tool again.

 

 

 

TAPE (2 KINDS)

Duct tape will fix anything but a broken heart. If you can't fix it with duct tape it cannot be fixed. The uses are virtually limitless. Also get some electrical tape because it make you look like you know what you are doing.

WRENCHS

A good pair of channel locks and a couple adjustable wrenches should be more than enough for most applications.

 

 

 

LEVEL

The kind with the bubbles. Otherwise your pictures will be crooked.

 

 

 

A TOOL BOX

Something big enough to fit your tools in and a few more down the line. Keeps tools organized, clean, and easy to find.

Tourist traps and roadside attractions in the PNW! Pt. 1 (Originally published 6/17)

Remember when you were young and the family would pile into the station wagon and go on the proverbial summertime road trip? Stopping along the way to witness the various balls of twine, corn palaces, and prehistoric forests? Me neither, my parents were far too annoyed at themselves for thinking that a 3,000 mile cross-country road trip with 4 hyperactive boys would somehow be enjoyable. There was no doing anything that might prolong the journey. With that in mind here is a list of some roadside attractions and tourist traps in the PNW that you can do now that your folks aren’t calling the shots.

Prehistoric Garden

36848 US-101,

Port Orford, OR 97465

http://www.prehistoricgardens.com

 Nestled amongst the ancient growth of old rainforest near the city of Bandon, OR is the Prehistoric Garden. Home to over 20 life-sized and incredibly cheesy dinosaurs! Walking paths take you through a section of rainforest that hides many terrifying prehistoric monsters rendered in colorful and (probably) inaccurate detail. Prehistoric Gardens is fun, outdoors, goofy, and educational! Definitely hit up the gift shop and bring the children or the child in you.

The Oregon Vortex

http://www.oregonvortex.com/

4303 Sardine Creek Left Fork Road

Gold Hill, Oregon 97525-9732

+1 (541) 855-1543

mystery@oregonvortex.com

The Oregon vortex is a collection of optical illusions that the proprietors insist are magical phenomena, so you know it’s great. This is from the website: “The Oregon Vortex is a glimpse of a strange world where the improbable is the commonplace and everyday physical facts are reversed. It is an area of naturally occurring visual and perceptual phenomena, which can be captured on film. No matter your education or profession you will find a challenge to all your accepted theories.”  

How can you resist THAT!? On top of that, it is the inspiration for the Mystery Shack from the show, “Gravity Falls”. Watch the following incredibly corny video from the 90’s. Rad.

https://youtu.be/9Vs-oeKpD7w

Next week we will talk about Jake the Alligator man and the Ghost towns of Washington! Spooky

Things adults were completely wrong about

You need to learn this. (A.K.A. You won't have calculators in your pockets)

First off, I did NOT need to learn algebra and I DO carry a calculator in my pocket. Along with that calculator is access to an ever-evolving compendium of all human knowledge for free and on demand. I have a video recorder, SMS messaging device, web browser, music player daily planner, step counter, shopping device, the ultimate educational tool, satellite navigation, and I can make phone calls.

Cursive

Who can read this? How do we even know what it says?

Ok what the heck was cursive even about? They say you need to learn cursive so you can read historical documents like the constitution. I can read and write cursive but I sure can't read the constitution. That's just bad penmanship. I have never used or been asked to use cursive at any moment in my life outside of grade school. I mean, let's think about this critically, they won't teach you how to do taxes or anything else remotely useful but they demand we learn how to write swoopy letters.

All Sci-Fi (It was their vision for their world and they still couldn't manage it.)

WHERE THE HECK IS MY JETPACK AND HOVER BORT!?!? Oh the promises you old timers made about the future. Instead of living like the Jetsons we are living the Real Housewives of Long Island or whatever nonsense they air these days. Instead of the good "Back to the Future" future we have the bad one where Biff is president. This is your fault, old ones.

Don't Curse.

Your parents are hypocrites. They curse when you aren't looking and they curse about you when you aren't around. Everybody swears and swearing even increases your pain tolerance. Your parents would have you believe that there is never a cause for foul language but there is definitely a time and place. Like when you are in Walmart and some family of Orcas 17 strong are walking at .03 MPH side-by-side blocking the entire isle!

You will achieve your dreams

You won't. If you are smart you will adjust your dreams.

This is all the astronauts we need.

Listen, if everyone got to be what they wanted when they were ten years old the streets would be full of garbage and the moon would be full of unemployed astronauts. Someone needs to fix the toilets and why shouldn't that person be you? By the way, being a garbage collector is an excellent job and if you make fun of them you are scum.

Spring Planting - Spring vegetable Gardening tips

If you have been in the PNW for more than 20 minutes you know it rains. A lot. The upside of this is the fact that things grow pretty well out here. Sure things would grow better if the sun would come out for more than 4 minutes at a time but let’s try to stay positive, this is only the first paragraph. Normally, the things that grow out here aren’t very tasty but with a little know-how you could be growing some fresh veggies that also don’t taste particularly good but they ARE good for you. So you got that going for you, which is nice.

Not everything is going to take off like you might hope but there are some really great planting choices that should put some food on the table. Given the right conditions a person could really score some quality roughage. So whaddya say, want to grow some veggies?

First let’s talk soil. The soil around here can be provide some challenges as a lot of it is sand or clay. What you want is loam (whatever that is). There are things one can do to treat the soil such as digging in lime or adding compost or manure. I prefer to just give all that noise a pass and build some raised garden beds with purchased soil.

 https://youtu.be/PVgdfwRbStU - Building a raised garden bed. This is a best option if you have clay soil. The second best way to garden in clay is to turn it into pottery, fill the pottery with dirt and grow plants in that. We’ll save that for a different blog (we won’t).

                Next thing we should cover is what to plant. Everybody loves to grow tomatoes but the harsh truth is that tomatoes don’t grow all that well out here. Tomatoes, beans, summer squash, peppers, eggplants, and tomatillos need warmth and something called sunlight (which is rare in these parts) to germinate, produce fruit, and mature. In cold, damp soil, seeds rot. During wet weather, bees are less likely to be active, further reducing your chances of success. That doesn’t mean you CAN’T grow tomatoes, they just take a little extra care to provide a yield worth the effort. The first plants you should consider planting in the spring include peas, lettuce, broccoli, kale, and collards. Plant these crops in late March and again in July for a fall crop. In April, plant the root vegetables, including radishes, carrots, turnips, parsnips, and beets. You like beets, right?

 A great resource for more information is the WSU website for gardening at http://gardening.wsu.edu/. Take some time to review the info they have when deciding what and where you will plant. The site will also have info on a number of other related subjects such as greenhouses, local wildlife, and ornamental plants. Remember, every vegetable you grow is one you don’t have to buy so you can feel a lot better about letting it go bad in your vegetable crisper.

Happy Gardening!

Austin J. M. Caylor

Blogmaster General

SPRING CLEANING! It Is Time.

 Whole House

·         Dusting

·         Remove cobwebs

·         Vacuum all carpets

·         Change sheets if needed

·         Dust and degrease ceiling fans

·         Clean mirrors and glass surfaces

·         Wipe window sills & clean glass doors

·         Clean prints on windows/doors

·         Remove all garbage

·         Wash and Reline waste baskets

·         Wash all floors

·         Disinfect tv remotes, phones, computer keyboards and mouse

In The Bathrooms

·         Clean/sanitize sinks

·         Clean/sanitize tubs, shower, toilet

·         Clean mirrors

·         Dust light fixtures and bulbs

·         Wash Floors

In The Kitchen

·         Clean all counter tops

·         Clean inside/outside microwave

·         Wipe down cabinet facings

·         Clean all appliances outside

·         Polish stainless steel appliances

·         Clean glass doors

·         Clean/sanitize/polish sinks

·         Wash floors

Misc.

·         Clean all wall hangings

·         Remove books and clean bookshelves

·         Wet-wash baseboards and door facings

·         Clean window sills

·         Clean inside windows

·         Clean light fixtures

·         Clean outsides of cabinets in kitchen and bathrooms

·         Clean ceiling fans

·         Dust vents

·         Vacuum/sweep under beds and furniture (if accessible)

·         Check furnace filter

·         Check smoke and carbon monoxide detector batteries

Annual Inspections - Why we do them, what we look for, and how to prepare.

It's almost time for annual inspections which means we will be visiting every single unit and rifling through your drawers (kidding!) In reality we will be examining the entire property inside and out looking for needed repairs, tenant damages, and lease violations. To help you prepare for our visit and minimize the amount of time we spend in your home I have prepared a list of things we look for during an inspection.

The list of things is very long so I will only be mentioning the major ones. Essentially we examine every aspect of the property inside and out to make sure everything is in working order and to maintain curb appeal. We will also look around for lease violations like drug paraphernalia (including pot stuff), unauthorized pets/tenants, improper use, satanic ritual killings, failure to maintain landscaping, etc.  If you conduct your own inspection now and call us with anything you find that needs repairing, than we will be in and out and it will save everyone time.

OUTSIDE

Is the grass cut? (For those of you that are required to maintain your yard)

Is there garbage or debris in your yard?

Is all pet waste is picked up?

Are the covers on dryer vent?

Are there any rat holes in yard or signs of other pests?

Are there any hazardous or flammable materials improperly stored?

Is there a fire pit or charcoal BBQ?

Are exteriors faucets leaking?

Are the downspouts connected?

Are the gutters full?

Is there excessive moss on roofs?

Are there broken windows or screens?

Are the fences in good shape?

INSIDE

Any leaks from fixtures or the roof?

Are the appliances working?

What condition are the carpets in?

How does the paint look?

Are there any damages caused by tenant negligence or misuse?

Evidence of drug use or criminal behavior?

Excessive garbage?

Evidence or presence of unauthorized pets/tenants

Evidence of smoking inside?

Are the smoke detectors and carbon monoxide detectors working?

Are their holes in the doors or walls?

Is the unit very dirty?

Are the blinds ok?

OK that turned out to be a long list anyways. Sorry. The point is we will be giving you a 48 hour intent to enter notice which should be enough time for you to pick up your dog poo so we don't have to give you notice. Isn't that nice of us?

How to Drive

It occured to me recently as I was being run off the road by a gentleman in a large truck talking on his cellphone that many people living in the Portland/Vancouver area do not know how to drive. They have vehicles, they have driver's licenses, and they have places to go but it seems as though they are just winging it once they leave the drive way. So in the interest of self-preservation I have decided to educate the masses on some of the finer points. I know this is difficult for a lot of people so I will take it slow and try to make it easy for you with lots of pictures! First stop: BLINKERS!

The image above is of a device that you probably have in your car and always wondered what it was. It's called an "indicator stalk", "Turn Signal", or "Blinker". This device, when activated, causes little lights on the rear and front corners of the car to flash indicating which direction you intend to turn. If you drive a luxury car (especially a BMW) you have never used this. Please start.

This diagram is of a Roundabout. A roundabout is a four-way intersection without stop signs, SO DON"T STOP UNLESS YOU HAVE TO! Seriously they are better than four-way stops they all go in the same direction and sometime they are multi-lane. I need you to study this diagram.

OK this is a point of contention among many people: How to properly merge in traffic. I know it seems like a jerk move to drive all the way to the end of the merge lane before getting into traffic but it is the correct method. If you try to merge early you will end up slowing down traffic and I will hate you. The idea behind this is to alternate cars and come together like a zipper. Please study this diagram as well.

The above image is you. Following me. 3 FEET AWAY FROM MY BUMPER! Fun Fact: Did you know that if you follow really closely behind the car in front of you it does NOT actually make you arrive faster? Crazy right!?!?! It's totally true!! Also, you should know that I WILL brake-check you. I don't like my car that much.

Does it sound like I am little irked? I am. I moved here from the country where people knew how to drive and I didn't have to take my life in my hands just to get some tacos. Don't get me wrong, I will die for a taco but I would rather not because then there would be no more tacos.

Security Deposits and How to Keep Them

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED 07/14/17

Today I am going to get a little more serious and talk about something that is very near and dear to your heart: your money. As you no doubt know, when we collect a security deposit from a new tenant we do so to ensure that you will take care of the unit and if not, we have some funds set aside to repair or replace damaged elements of your unit. How much of that money you get back is ultimately up to you.

A security deposit is always held in a separate account and does not mingle with other operating funds of the company as it is not our money. That is why when you moved in we asked for the deposit(s) to be paid in a separate check – it is going to a different account. That money can only be used for certain things.

WHAT CAN MY DEPOSIT BE USED FOR?

Your landlord is in charge of updating anything in the property that wears out over time. But “if you damage the property, repairs are your responsibility,” says David Hryck, a lawyer specializing in real estate and a partner at Reed Smith in New York City. This means that “normal wear and tear” is the landlord’s responsibility. Wear and Tear can mean a number of different things and is often dependent on the unit. It is easier to say what ISN’T wear and tear. For instance, Old faded carpets might be wear and tear but stains on carpets are not and just because a carpet is old doesn’t mean you won’t get charged for a cleaning. A leaky roof is wear and tear but if you fail to notify the landlord and damages result you will be held responsible for them. Basically we want the unit returned to us in the condition it was in when you took possession. The sort of things you will get charged for include carpet cleaning (if it was cleaned before you moved in), broken doors, bent/broken blinds, dirty walls or walls with drawing/writing on them, professional cleaning services (if you did not clean the unit enough), burnt out light bulbs, dirty stove or fridge pan, etc. The main thing to remember is clean the ever-loving heck outta the place and try not to break stuff.

HOW CAN I GET MY DEPOSIT BACK?

When you move in you will be asked to complete a move-in walkthrough form. Use this as well as pictures to document any pre-existing damages within the unit, this way you cannot be charged for them when you move out. Be sure to take photos when you leave as well so that you have proof of its condition. Another thing to note is that you need to leave a forwarding address with your landlord so they know where to mail the check!

If you are diligent about documenting damages, caring for and cleaning your unit, and alerting the landlord to any events or damages that might cause further damage then you should not have a problem getting back the vast majority of your deposit. Expect to pay for professional carpet cleaning regardless and don’t bother renting a Rug Doctor from Safeway because that won’t cut it. If you don’t want to pay for a professional cleaner you will need to do an amazing job of cleaning EVERYTHING! Stove, oven, fridge, drip pans, window tracks, light switches, ceiling fan blades, walls, etc. All the stuff you hate to clean – our cleaning person loves. Clean that stuff and save some money.

LET’S RECAP!

Document all damages on the walkthrough and take photos, make sure you alert management to any faults in the property immediately, don’t smoke in your unit, don’t get mad at your girlfriend and punch holes in things, don’t let your cat play in the blinds, and expect to pay for carpet cleaning. If you keep all these things in mind you should have no problem getting back your deposit and we’ll have no problem giving back your deposit.